Lately I've been working all the time, so I always felt too tired to go out. Unfortunately, I'll still stay up til 3am, talking and thinking, and it's been getting me into a lot of trouble!
I'm realizing a lot things about myself that I probably never needed to know, like the fact that I'm a living caution sign. I'm super safe, I always follow the rules, I'm too nice to everybody. I try on things a million times before I buy it. I take everyone's extra shifts at work, I stay late if a co-worker is feeling ill. I'm sickeningly sweet to people that I DESPISE more than anything and I'll pretent I don't hear or see if someone's insulting me. Sometimes I feel like I'm living for others, and not for myself. Before I do anything, I think about what my parents think first. I wanted to do something just for me, so I thought, "Oh. I'll get a lip piercing and NOT CARE about what my parents think".
A lip piercing? Really? A lip piercing?
I was SO set for a few hours, finding studs and retainers online and everything. I even had a date set up, and a guy that would do it.
Since then, I talked to some pretty smart people and then decided against it. I think my parents' trust mean too much for me. Or what I have of it, anyway. That and the fact that my dad straight up told me several times that we would disown me.
I'm still getting something pierced, though. Something that I feel shouldn't be a big deal at all, something that's easier to hide and easier to explain.
Don't worry, I'm not going to start becoming a badass. I'm still going to be the same person and all, because I like being the person that people can trust and come to.
Ooh. Too much thinking.
Payton and I have also started making list of qualities we admire in the opposite sex.
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