I totally need to get out of the house.

Lately I've been working all the time, so I always felt too tired to go out. Unfortunately, I'll still stay up til 3am, talking and thinking, and it's been getting me into a lot of trouble!

I'm realizing a lot things about myself that I probably never needed to know, like the fact that I'm a living caution sign. I'm super safe, I always follow the rules, I'm too nice to everybody. I try on things a million times before I buy it. I take everyone's extra shifts at work, I stay late if a co-worker is feeling ill. I'm sickeningly sweet to people that I DESPISE more than anything and I'll pretent I don't hear or see if someone's insulting me. Sometimes I feel like I'm living for others, and not for myself. Before I do anything, I think about what my parents think first. I wanted to do something just for me, so I thought, "Oh. I'll get a lip piercing and NOT CARE about what my parents think".
A lip piercing? Really? A lip piercing?
I was SO set for a few hours, finding studs and retainers online and everything. I even had a date set up, and a guy that would do it.
Since then, I talked to some pretty smart people and then decided against it. I think my parents' trust mean too much for me. Or what I have of it, anyway. That and the fact that my dad straight up told me several times that we would disown me.
I'm still getting something pierced, though. Something that I feel shouldn't be a big deal at all, something that's easier to hide and easier to explain.

Don't worry, I'm not going to start becoming a badass. I'm still going to be the same person and all, because I like being the person that people can trust and come to.

Ooh. Too much thinking.
Payton and I have also started making list of qualities we admire in the opposite sex.

I like to think that I'm a great driver, but that probably isn't true.
I thought I did everything correctly, but that obviously isn't true either.
Tonight I got pulled over for going 31 in a 20 mph zone on the UNT campus.
Luckily I got a warning with my excuse being the all-too-common, "I'm not from here" (I'm actually not! Not really, anyway..)
I was as friendly as could be, so my amicable attitude towards the situation (despite me FREAKING OUT to Eric in the passenger seat) got me off the hook.
That and the lack of a criminal record in my name.


I was really scared.
I know it's not much, but it was a big deal to me.
That is all.

Today was the first

Time I visited UNT as a prospective student.
Time I've been to a post secret event.
Time I've been told so many secrets.

Time I've ever gotten pulled over.
Time I got let off with just a warning.